Finding your style after a baby

 Another unexpected challenge you (or at least I) have to face after giving birth is learning how to dress yourself again — and more importantly, learning how to feel comfortable in your body. Because the truth is, your body has changed. It’s not just about bouncing back or losing the baby weight; it’s about figuring out who you are now in this new skin.

If you’re anything like me, your belly has deflated, so none of your maternity clothes really fit anymore — they hang off you awkwardly. But at the same time, your pre-pregnancy clothes don’t fit either because your body overall is just... different. You may have gained weight in areas you didn’t expect, and there's this new soft little pooch on your belly that somehow manages to poke out of every outfit you thought was “forgiving.” And then there are your boobs — swollen, uneven, sometimes sore, maybe leaky — just totally foreign.

It honestly feels like being a self-conscious teenager all over again. Your body is shifting, unfamiliar, and not necessarily in ways you recognize as "you." So when you stand in front of the closet and ask, “What do I even wear?” it’s not a superficial question — it’s about identity. And to complicate things further, you’re now a mom. So even the clothes you used to love might feel a little off, like they belong to a version of you that doesn’t exist anymore. Crop tops? Tight jeans? Short skirts? They might technically still fit, but emotionally, it’s another story. They feel too young, too revealing, too “not mom.”

And yet, ironically, it’s probably only you who notices or cares this deeply. To everyone else, you look like a normal woman in the postpartum haze. But to you, it’s a minefield of feeling out of place in your own wardrobe, your own body, your own reflection.

Then there’s the exhaustion — that bone-deep tiredness that comes with caring for a newborn. You want to get healthy, maybe lose a bit of weight, or at least feel stronger and more like yourself, but you’re too tired to even think about working out or prepping a healthy meal. Sometimes just remembering to drink water feels like a big win.

For me, there’s an added layer: I’m about to start staying home full-time, and my entire wardrobe is made up of work clothes — structured dresses, blouses, slacks — nothing practical for running errands, nursing, or just hanging out at the park. So I’ve been trying to rebuild my closet with more mom-friendly options: sundresses, rompers, comfy athletic wear. But even that feels confusing. Some of it looks like something a college student would wear — and while, yes, I am technically the same age as college kids, I’m definitely not in the same stage of life.

Meanwhile, the baby? Always dressed perfectly. Adorable matching onesies, tiny shoes, coordinated blankets — basically a walking Instagram post. And then there’s me: running around in whatever clean thing I can find, hoping I don’t bump into anyone I know, looking like a total hot mess most days.

There is a reason for every challenge and season, even if its a challenge as superficial as not liking your body. Pray about it and see what God reveals he gave you this body to bring life to the world and that is a gift even if it is hard to remember that. sometimes (most the time) our human thoughts get in the way when all we need to do is see ourselves through Gods eyes, or at least try to.

It’s a weird limbo, trying to redefine yourself in this new phase. You’re still you, but you’re not the same. And neither is your closet. And that's ok, we just need to find ourselves again.

Ecclesiastes 3:1:
"For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven".